of wedding bells, ribbons, champagne and cupcakes

been watching lots of telly and there’s like a whole channel dedicated for brides-to-be in the daytime – how they pick their dress, how the whole wedding planning’s falling apart and a ‘fairy godmother wedding planner specialist’ grants 3 wishes to help them out, how some plus-sized brides-to-be allow themselves to be subject to 6 weeks of sheer physical training in order to fit nicely into their dress…

i recall a conversation with Jo some time ago and apparently, she told me one should start planning for one’s wedding at least 1 1/2 – 2 years beforehand. mine’s gona be in december 2012, tentatively. well, then again, everything’s tentative until they come to pass, no? but i doubt i will have time to do all the preparation when i get back cos’ it’ll be my final semester and then i’ll have to sit for a 1-year bar course and finally get my career moving. it’ll be good to start thinking about what we want and perhaps hand it to a wedding planner to help us out. i can’t wait to get out of school and start working. i’m tired of studying (something i know i’ll miss when i’m working), watching the numbers in my bank account dwindle and of the big kids i have to put up with in class.

i’ve already found my choice photographer and Ju and i will be placing our deposits next year when i get back home. this guy we chanced upon on, has an eye for artistic, ad-like photography and somehow i find his style very similar to what my photojournalism tutor in poly, wayne umehara, taught us. we’re planning to have our wedding pictures taken when we fly over to perth for Ju’s graduation. would be nice to have our photographs taken where we fell crazy in love – it’s going to cost us, but i know it’s going to be worth it, capturing precious moments at spots we used to hang out.

we have a rough idea on venue so far, but the events person for this restaurant does not exactly make good PR material. it’ll be a nice, cosy and novel luncheon with closest friends and family, instead of the whole hotel ballroom routine. i’m terribly bored of the same chinese foodfare and the monotonous custom that most brides and grooms go through. really, the only difference at each wedding dinner i attend, is the couple who’s exchanging their vows. everything else is pretty much the same.

i don’t know how everything will work out but i think it’s good to talk it through occasionally and see how everything develops…i’m really excited for our big day and i can’t wait for the day that i am finally the blushing bride myself.

oh, and did i mention a fitted cheongsam is a must?

i have my eyes on…

(cost: CAD$349.99, excl. 13% tax)
best thing to come out of canada next to south park, maple syrup and some say justin bieber (lol)…

and…

(cost: CAD$270, excl. 13% tax)
okay, this is from australia and canada is not exactly the best place to buy this, but i do need winter boots to keep my toes warm…

big ticket items for a student ‘supposedly’ on a self-imposed budget, if you ask me…plus the 1.3 exchange rate and the 13% tax does not help matters. i may postpone getting the phone till i’m in vancouver though since their provincial tax rates are slightly lower and i’m hoping the prices drop by then in december, but i’m most probably going to get my UGGs soon when i get the time to go down to the shops and try them on. i’ve always wanted them, but never had a need for them in singapore and i could never decide on which model i wanted.

shall control my shopping urges though, since niagara, montreal, vancouver, new york, michigan, seattle and washington is on my list of places that i will be travelling to over the next few months.

reflections

coming to toronto has made me realize a couple of things that weren’t apparent to me when i was back home.

i realized that i have forgotten how to make friends and how to be a friend ever since i got so engrossed with going back to school. my classmates are younger, our backgrounds were significantly different (they went to JC and i went to poly) and i chose to just do my own things and focus on studies than to develop friendships. there were a few godsent people who i could talk to beyond the first couple of introductory lines, although i don’t think we will ever get to the extent of being best of friends. moreover, i had been struggling the last 2 years to catch up with my education as a mature student and believe me, it wasn’t easy to juggle, but God always came through for me each semester.

i had also reduced my circle of friends significantly after i got into a relationship with Ju and we chose to spend the weekends with family, at church and just simply chilling out with each other. not that it’s a bad thing, but i think as we get older, our priorities change. and as your relationship with someone grows, your priorities as a couple change and mould towards a compromise to each other’s. it’s not that we do not want to hang out with friends constantly, but somehow it was never our style to hang out with our groups of friends that we knew before each other and the friends which we used to hang out also started to change their priorities as they got older, got married or got busy.

our closeness as a couple made it a lot more difficult for the both of us to part when i had to leave for toronto. all of Ju’s and my weekends revolved around each other. what else do we do if we didn’t have each other? although i went out a few times for the last few weekends i was here to explore the city with my new friends, my heart and mind was back home with him. most people would call this ‘over-reliance’ on each other and i do not deny that we are indeed reliant on one another; but then again, what meaning is there in a relationship where two people don’t need each other?

i think the main thing for me now is to keep our relationship in constant prayer and let God guide me on how to strike a balance in my relationship with Ju while i’m here and he’s there for the next couple of months and for me to forge new friendships, even though i’m only here for 4 months. the people i have met and continued to meet every now and then has been awesome so far, and i think i should make an effort to meet more of them. they have been nothing but friendly and kind and the locals here have been mostly welcoming and warm, which is a stark difference from those at home. surprisingly, i have not met a singaporean here in a city that’s totally multicultural with everyone from all over the world, but it’s all good to get away from those at home for awhile.

jean v. jean

i’m sitting in my cozy room right now looking through the windows and watching the light drizzle outside, contemplating whether i should go for my 6pm class or not. it was raining both yesterday and the whole of today and it was freezing (by my standards of ‘cold’)…it was so chilly when i was coming back from eaton centre after i couldn’t resist my urge to pack KFC (which was utterly disappointing – the canadians don’t know how to cook! they just threw the chicken and rolled it in salt or something) and on the way back, my hands froze from holding the icy drink that came along with the meal till i almost dropped it because i couldn’t feel my fingers any more. -_-’

as i blog, i’m simultaneously trying to work out my internal conflict on whether to go for an evening class that i’m really lazy to do so because i’m having my intensive classes this entire week (which converts to a multitude of readings that i can never finish)…and my course grade is based on my essay that i have to hand up and not the stuff that he covers in class…excuses, excuses, excuses…

and on the other hand, i hadn’t had time to do the readings for the 6pm class – so i guess the more i should attend classes and get a summary of what i had missed? if i start missing a class, i might just get into the habit of doing so? i know i’m here on exchange and i’m graded on a pass/fail basis which means that i can just do the bare minimum to pass, but i don’t think i’ll be too happy just to put in anything less than my 100%.

i don’t know man. i hate to skip classes – i just don’t think it’s me to do so, but the weather conditions outside and the pile of readings due for tomorrow’s classes doesn’t make it easy for me to decide. sigh.

i think i’ll just go for classes. whatever. sorry you had to read through this entry and watch me talk myself out of my dilemma and into going for classes – it probably didn’t make sense. lol.

12 hours behind…

in the opposite end of the world right now settling in nicely…so far the weather has been kind since my arrival to toronto and as much as i pray it’ll continue to stay that way, i am gearing up to brave my first experience with snow with both excitement and trepidation, having come from a tropical country that’s nothing but hot all year round. even the raindrops feel warm down your skin in singapore.

took the happenings of my life offline for a good 6 months. i don’t need everyone to know me that well and follow my inner thoughts, just the precious few people whom i hold close to my heart. i don’t give a damn about popularity ratings with others, unlike some, who are attention-deficit and crave for any and every ounce of attention and then shout about it from their high horses when they receive it. in the midst of striving for all the wrong reasons, i think these people lost their souls.

generally, i rather open myself up to people that i find simple, without any hidden agenda and are truly themselves when they are with me. i can do without juggling multiple/split personalities and people that i cannot fathom – those that say one thing yet do another.

for now, i’m glad to be away for awhile to meet new people, make new friends and lead a life immersed in a totally different culture. God is truly good, in all places, all the time.